When you have an organisation which recruits a bulk of their closest friends (who don't really do their part of the responsibility anyway) as a part of the group, you know that it will be a shaky one.
And then you have someone who loves ordering people around and passing off harsh remarks about what the others are doing without giving it much thought. Thing is, they're your friends. Even if you want to tell your friends off, you do it in a nicer manner instead of blasting them outright. The person doesn't really lift a finger in helping out her part of the job anyway, nor participate in team discussions, so what power does that give you to criticise?
Stop it. Even if you're older than the rest of us, in terms of being staff or being a human, please learn to be more tactful in your words.
Day by day you're getting on my nerves. Really.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Living Without Really Living
I was asked this question by one of the specialists that I had attached to the other day:
"Would you rather achieve a state of enlightenment and stay in a place where there's no suffering nor pleasure, or would you rather be reincarnated and get embroiled in this vicious cycle of life where you would inevitably have to suffer, but at the same time you can also enjoy various things in life?"
The essence of life, to me, is about enjoying the process of it, or to go through the various obstacles only to emerge stronger at the end of it all.
However, when I was given the scenario where I had to put myself in the shoes of a young cancer patient (who is only several years older than I am but is currently wheelchair-bound), I could no longer answer the question.
If I had to go through so much suffering and be faced with the reality that I might only have a year or two to survive, I'd probably wouldn't want to be reincarnated just to possibly go through such things again.
Then again, we wouldn't really know what our next life would bring if we don't get reincarnated, would we?
Hmm, this makes you think, doesn't it?
"Would you rather achieve a state of enlightenment and stay in a place where there's no suffering nor pleasure, or would you rather be reincarnated and get embroiled in this vicious cycle of life where you would inevitably have to suffer, but at the same time you can also enjoy various things in life?"
The essence of life, to me, is about enjoying the process of it, or to go through the various obstacles only to emerge stronger at the end of it all.
However, when I was given the scenario where I had to put myself in the shoes of a young cancer patient (who is only several years older than I am but is currently wheelchair-bound), I could no longer answer the question.
If I had to go through so much suffering and be faced with the reality that I might only have a year or two to survive, I'd probably wouldn't want to be reincarnated just to possibly go through such things again.
Then again, we wouldn't really know what our next life would bring if we don't get reincarnated, would we?
Hmm, this makes you think, doesn't it?
Thursday, May 03, 2012
Disappointed
The more I listen to stories from patients, the more I think, things like this shouldn't be happening.
If only I had the power to change things.
If only I had the power to change things.
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Petition to bring SS4/SJ Fanmeet to 3 Countries!
Hello there!
Do you happen to know any fellow ELF who would be interested/dying to go for a Super Show 4 concert and/or Super Junior fanmeet in the USA, Malaysia, and the Philippines?
If so, here's a piece of good news! Us at SJ-WORLD.NET have set up petitions to bring Super Junior to the countries stated above, and if you happen to know anyone who are interested in having Super Junior in their countries, or any other ELF who have the intentions to travel to these countries to watch the Super Junior boys performing on stage, please spread this piece of news to them!
Here are the links to the respective topics:
USA: http://sj-world.net/forums/index.php?showtopic=73133
Malaysia: http://sj-world.net/forums/index.php?showtopic=73147
Philippines: http://sj-world.net/forums/index.php?showtopic=73164
Every vote will be greatly appreciated for these petitions, but please do remember to leave a reply at the threads after you have submitted your votes - otherwise it will not be counted! We need all the help that we can get to spread this to every one out there, because a large number (at least 1,000) signatures will be needed to make the petition count!
Any and every help given to promote these petitions are also sincerely appreciated! ♥ Thank you in advance!
Regards,
Chrys
eternalsnow @ SJ-WORLD.NET
Translator
Do you happen to know any fellow ELF who would be interested/dying to go for a Super Show 4 concert and/or Super Junior fanmeet in the USA, Malaysia, and the Philippines?
If so, here's a piece of good news! Us at SJ-WORLD.NET have set up petitions to bring Super Junior to the countries stated above, and if you happen to know anyone who are interested in having Super Junior in their countries, or any other ELF who have the intentions to travel to these countries to watch the Super Junior boys performing on stage, please spread this piece of news to them!
Here are the links to the respective topics:
USA: http://sj-world.net/forums/index.php?showtopic=73133
Malaysia: http://sj-world.net/forums/index.php?showtopic=73147
Philippines: http://sj-world.net/forums/index.php?showtopic=73164
Every vote will be greatly appreciated for these petitions, but please do remember to leave a reply at the threads after you have submitted your votes - otherwise it will not be counted! We need all the help that we can get to spread this to every one out there, because a large number (at least 1,000) signatures will be needed to make the petition count!
Any and every help given to promote these petitions are also sincerely appreciated! ♥ Thank you in advance!
Regards,
Chrys
eternalsnow @ SJ-WORLD.NET
Translator
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
That Someone Is You - Chapter 13
13
“What's our star student doing staring blankly into space?”
Jungsoo's amused voice filtered into the room, causing Hyukjae to snap out of his daydream and glance around in a confused manner. It took the younger man several moments before he remembered that he was in Gwangju, waiting for their turn to do a special performance.
Hyukjae wiped his face down with his palm to get rid of the haziness in his head. “What are you talking about, Teukkie hyung?” he breathed and shook his head slightly. “The star student of the group is off playing computer games somewhere.”
“You're the star student now. Never skipping classes, always studying. Like you said, Kyu's off somewhere playing games as usual,” Jungsoo laughed, taking up the space next to Hyukjae on the sofa. The latter scooted over to create a larger area for Jungsoo to sit on.
“I'm pretty sure there's a part in all of us who wants to live a normal life for once,” Hyukjae smiled wryly, his gums showing. “Might as well take the opportunity to enjoy it while it lasts.”
Jungsoo shrugged in response. “I guess you're right. How's university treating you lately? I feel like I haven't seen you around in a while.”
Hyukjae sighed. “Professors, good. Student body, not so. Besides, you don't stay at the dorms. Of course you would feel that way.”
“True,” Jungsoo concurred. “I only ever see you in Sukira these days. And what happened in university? Are you getting bullied or something?” he then asked, eyeing Hyukjae suspiciously.
Hyukjae noticed the expression that Jungsoo was wearing, and he quickly waved him off. “No! Don't get the wrong ideas, hyung. It's just the usual – people who can't keep their comments to themselves.”
Jungsoo's mouth twisted in annoyance. Although he could tolerate the slander against him, his anger would shoot up a notch when his younger brothers have to bite the bullet. “What sort of nonsense have they been spewing this time?”
“That I'm back on campus and diligently attending classes just because I want to butter the professors into giving me good grades without me putting in any effort,” Hyukjae mumbled, feeling a familiar dull ache in his chest. No one understands him. No one bothers to.
“That’s ridiculous. You’re one of the most hardworking people I know, job-related or not,” Jungsoo scoffed in disbelief. “I still remember how you barely got any sleep while doing your exam preps.”
“You’re practically family and they’re…outsiders. You know, but they don’t,” sighed the other. “Don’t worry about me, hyung. I can manage. Besides, you have enough on your own plate at the moment. It would do you better to be less stressed out by other things,” Hyukjae pointed out with another wry smile.
The joyful expressions on Jungsoo’s face immediately fell at the statement. He knew perfectly well what Hyukjae was trying to imply. Angie. His wife was alone at home, three hours away from their current location. It really didn’t help that she was freaking out over some unknown stalker who had been harassing them – or specifically, her – for ages.
“It’s not like I can do anything about it,” Jungsoo exhaled, shoulders slumping in defeat. “It’s orders from the company.”
“You can,” Hyukjae retorted mildly. “You just have to stop placing our fans on such a high pedestal. Things have changed. You’re married, hyung. Your family should come first.”
Jungsoo frowned. “They do, Hyukjae. I would never give my family up for anything else in the world.”
“And yet you’re here instead of accompanying your very pregnant wife back in Seoul,” Hyukjae raised an eyebrow at him, eyeing him sceptically.
The Super Junior leader frowned again. Hyukjae had a point.
“Me aside–” Jungsoo stressed, determined to change the subject. He didn’t really want to discuss about his decision to appear for the concert in Gwangju instead of being with Angie, especially when it gave him a massive headache just by thinking about it. Besides, he was constantly sending text messages to his wife to make sure that she was okay. Surely she would be safe without him for the evening? “–I’m pretty sure you’re already immune to people whispering nonsense behind your back. So what else is troubling you?”
“Yesung hyung was right when he said you’re better off working as a mind reader,” Hyukjae finally heaved a sigh, stuffing his face into a cushion which he had grabbed off the other sofa.
“So I was right,” the other man smiled thinly. “What’s up? You know you can always tell me stuff.”
Hyukjae raised his gaze from the cushion for a brief moment and locked it with Jungsoo’s. “Promise me you won’t tell anyone else? Especially not Donghae?” he pleaded with the most pitiful look he could muster. Something which he knew could butter his older brother up easily.
Jungsoo laughed. “I won’t if you insist. Why are you so afraid of letting Donghae know anyway?”
“He’ll strangle me for being an idiot,” Hyukjae mumbled miserably.
“Are things that bad on your side? I haven’t seen you in such a state in a very long while,” Jungsoo pointed out, suddenly feeling worried about the dancer. His upbeat self was nowhere to be found.
“I guess that’s what happens when you’re interested in the girl who is now one of your best friend’s girlfriend.”
The frown on Jungsoo’s expressions deepened at the statement, before transforming into an unmistakable scowl. “You’re not trying to tell me you’ve fallen for Minyoung, are you? Because I would personally kill you before Donghae even finds out about this.”
Hyukjae jumped at the older man’s words, his face as pale as a sheet of paper. “What the hell are you talking about hyung?! Of course I wouldn’t even think of hitting on any of your girlfriends! Brother’s code, remember?” he exclaimed, feeling incensed that Jungsoo would think of him in such a manner.
Jungsoo visibly relaxed at the reassurance, however. “Oh, so this girl is your friend… what’s his name again? – Shin-il’s girlfriend?”
Hyukjae nodded in a solemn manner.
“Have you even known her long enough to say that you’re in love with her?”
“Hyung, I didn’t say that I’m in love with her,” Hyukjae deadpanned. “I’m just… interested in being friends with her.”
“That’s new,” Jungsoo blurted. A pained yelp erupted from his throat moments later when Hyukjae landed a punch on his arm. “Hey! You know it’s true! How long has it been since you’re genuinely interested in just being friends with someone of the opposite gender?”
Hyukjae slumped into his seat. “A very long while…” he admitted, albeit reluctantly.
“There,” Jungsoo concluded, executing a little victory dance before his expressions turned serious again. “Anyway, I don’t see why you’re in such a huge dilemma, you idiot.”
“What–” the younger man started defensively, feeling every bit as offended by the term.
Jungsoo raised a hand to stop him before he could get the rest of his argument out. Hyukjae crossed his arms in front of his chest with a scowl on his face.
“My point is,” Jungsoo began again, hoping that Hyukjae wouldn’t attempt to interrupt him again, “if you intend to be friends with this girl, there’s nothing wrong with it. As long as you don’t attempt to turn her into your girlfriend somewhere along the way, of course. I’m sure Shin-il-sshi will understand.”
Hyukjae’s muscles loosened up slightly, and he turned to lock his gaze with Jungsoo’s. “Are you sure?” he asked with a wry smile.
“I can’t vouch that Shin-il-sshi will definitely not be upset or be remotely possessive over her, but you can always try. If you think that he’s pissed at you for being too close to his girlfriend, then you should take a step back.”
A gummy smile took over Hyukjae’s expressions by now, and he moved to pull Jungsoo into a tight hug. “Thanks, Teukkie hyung. You’re the best,” he said, just as the other Super Junior members burst into the room in a noisy mess.
* * * * *
Seohyeon ran a hand through her hair in frustration, prodding the butt of the pencil against her temple as she attempted to focus on her assignments that lay open in front of her. She was sporting a headache, and it didn’t at all help that there was a couple on the other side of her cubicle in the library who was being… less than discreet with their display of affection.
She guessed that they were indulging in a pretty steamy tongue war, judging by the wet, sloppy sounds gasps and giggles that reach her ears from time to time. A shudder ran down her spine when some unpleasant images flashed across her mind.
She scoffed, to think that I chose the most private corner so that I wouldn’t be disturbed.
“Focus,” Seohyeon told herself with finality, though at a controlled tone so that it wouldn’t alarm the couple. They didn’t seem to have realised that there were other students in their corner of the library.
A frown creased her forehead at her own thoughts. Shouldn’t she be interrupting them instead? She had the right to.
The contemplation ran around in her thoughts for a brief moment, before Seohyeon shook her head and picked up her pencil again. She would have to make do with the uncomfortable atmosphere she was in. At least it was better than having to hear the pair of seniors exchanging raunchy remarks in a too-loud voice right across the table.
Now that was the true definition of awkward. She really didn’t need to know what they planned to do with each other in the comforts of their dorm room in ten minutes’ time. So she upped and moved to her current location with a barely-managed polite bow at the pair.
Heaving a sigh, Seohyeon tuned out the pair seated on the reverse side of the cubicle, hoping that they would at least tune it down a little. And she would’ve succeeded in focusing on her studies, if not for the couple’s attempt at a conversation.
“You’re such a good kisser,” the girl had giggled breathlessly moments later. A soft moan of pleasure left her lips barely seconds after that; Seohyeon really didn’t want to know what had just happened.
“Everyone tells me that,” the guy boasted, also panting hard. His voice was rather strained, but something about its quality made Seohyeon perk up in attention.
That sounds familiar…
“Are you sure you wouldn’t get into trouble, doing this?” The girl spoke up again before Seohyeon could even deduce why the man’s voice gave her a sense of familiarity, derailing her train of thoughts.
There was a short pause, and then the man started talking again. “If you’ll be a good girl and not breathe a word about this to the rest, I won’t,” he let out a low chuckle, and Seohyeon found herself standing up in surprise at the recognition of the person’s voice.
The couple seemed equally astonished by Seohyeon’s actions, and the man’s eyes dilated in horror at the sight of Seohyeon.
“Hyukjae?” she found herself exclaiming before she could even stop herself.
* * * * *
His hands, which were in his pockets, were clenched into tight fists as he watched her walk towards her usual spot at the waterfront. He didn’t know why, but he felt extremely guilty when he was caught red-handed fooling around with another student by Seohyeon – in the library, no less.
He knew how much she loved and respected the place from the sparse amount of conversations they had shared.
That look of disbelief that flashed across her expressions when she managed to recognise him told a million other things – one of them being utter disappointment. There was also a trace of discomfort in her eyes, but he really couldn’t blame her. He was probably a little too loud with his remarks earlier.
Hyukjae heaved a dismayed sigh and hastened his pace, taking a seat right next to Seohyeon – she had asked to talk to him once she had gotten over the initial shock. His head was hung low as he absentmindedly kicked at the air right above the surface of the water. The corner of his lips curved up into a wry smile when he caught his reflection in the water; he seemed rather pathetic, not knowing how to initiate a conversation or what to say after that awkward encounter.
Minutes of silence passed between the both of them, before Hyukjae turned to look at her. “I’m sorry,” he said, surprised when she mirrored his actions and apology. He quirked an eyebrow at her. “What are you apologising for?”
Seohyeon flashed an awkward smile at him. “For interrupting your… business earlier.”
Hyukjae flushed a deep shade of scarlet. He could even feel the tips of his ears burning up from embarrassment. “I – uh – it doesn’t matter,” he blurted, mentally chastising himself at his lame reply. “I’m sorry you had to witness something like that,” he quickly added.
She squirmed uncomfortably in her position, seemingly having remembered something that had occurred. Hyukjae couldn’t help but wonder just how much she had heard.
“Are you… do you do this frequently?” she asked.
“No!” he immediately jumped, having every intention of correcting her misperception of him. It really wasn’t in his nature to be getting it on with girls in public places, but his heart craved for the intimate attention. Perhaps it was his way of tuning out unhappy events.
The awkward atmosphere was lifted slightly when Seohyeon chuckled a little at his response. She thought that it was rather adorable. “Relax, I’m not going to judge you because of your lifestyle,” she pointed out. “It’s your life after all, and you’re free to live it however you want to,” Seohyeon added.
Her heart wrenched at her own words. She knew full well how it felt to be judged have your life controlled by someone else. She wouldn’t dare wish it upon someone else.
Hyukjae visibly loosened up at the reassurance, lifting his head for the first time since they had arrived at the waterfront. “I’m glad. I was beginning to worry that you were going to ignore me after that incident.”
“I won’t. You have my word for it,” she said, and observed him closely. “You seem to be rather troubled, though. Did something happen?”
Hyukjae nearly fell backwards at the question; his arms which were supporting his weight gave way out of surprise. “N-no, why do you ask?”
“Like I said, you look troubled. Your focus is swimming around,” Seohyeon smiled knowingly.
“I…” he started, hesitating a little before shaking his head in response. “It’s not fair to burden you with my troubles, Seohyeon. Don’t worry about it; I’ll get through this somehow.”
“So you do have something on your mind,” she nudged him lightly with her shoulder. “Come on, you can always tell me what’s going on. That’s what friends are for, right?”
He looked at her with large, watery eyes, surprised by her for the umpteenth time that day – though this was a good kind of surprise. “We’re… friends?”
Seohyeon laughed at his question. “Of course we are, Hyukjae! Unless you refuse to befriend me?”
“No, but–”
“Then that’s settled. This has something to do with your group leader’s wife, doesn’t it?” she cut him off with a soft expression, watching as he stiffened at the question.
Although she didn’t know the specifics, or how close Hyukjae was with the person called Angie, but she knew that he was probably very affected by what had happened to the woman. He missed an entire week of classes; even Shin-il had failed to contact him.
“It’s… difficult,” he managed to choke out, staring up at the skies in hopes that his tears could be forced back in by the gravitational pull.
“I’m sorry to hear that, Hyukjae. If you need someone to talk to, I’m always here to listen,” Seohyeon said, giving him a light squeeze on his arm.
At that particular moment, he secretly felt relieved that there was finally someone else who understood him outside the entertainment circle, the other being Shin-il. The wall he had built around him was slowly crumbling into pieces, and it took all of his effort to not pull her into a rib-crushing hug and sob his heart out.
“What's our star student doing staring blankly into space?”
Jungsoo's amused voice filtered into the room, causing Hyukjae to snap out of his daydream and glance around in a confused manner. It took the younger man several moments before he remembered that he was in Gwangju, waiting for their turn to do a special performance.
Hyukjae wiped his face down with his palm to get rid of the haziness in his head. “What are you talking about, Teukkie hyung?” he breathed and shook his head slightly. “The star student of the group is off playing computer games somewhere.”
“You're the star student now. Never skipping classes, always studying. Like you said, Kyu's off somewhere playing games as usual,” Jungsoo laughed, taking up the space next to Hyukjae on the sofa. The latter scooted over to create a larger area for Jungsoo to sit on.
“I'm pretty sure there's a part in all of us who wants to live a normal life for once,” Hyukjae smiled wryly, his gums showing. “Might as well take the opportunity to enjoy it while it lasts.”
Jungsoo shrugged in response. “I guess you're right. How's university treating you lately? I feel like I haven't seen you around in a while.”
Hyukjae sighed. “Professors, good. Student body, not so. Besides, you don't stay at the dorms. Of course you would feel that way.”
“True,” Jungsoo concurred. “I only ever see you in Sukira these days. And what happened in university? Are you getting bullied or something?” he then asked, eyeing Hyukjae suspiciously.
Hyukjae noticed the expression that Jungsoo was wearing, and he quickly waved him off. “No! Don't get the wrong ideas, hyung. It's just the usual – people who can't keep their comments to themselves.”
Jungsoo's mouth twisted in annoyance. Although he could tolerate the slander against him, his anger would shoot up a notch when his younger brothers have to bite the bullet. “What sort of nonsense have they been spewing this time?”
“That I'm back on campus and diligently attending classes just because I want to butter the professors into giving me good grades without me putting in any effort,” Hyukjae mumbled, feeling a familiar dull ache in his chest. No one understands him. No one bothers to.
“That’s ridiculous. You’re one of the most hardworking people I know, job-related or not,” Jungsoo scoffed in disbelief. “I still remember how you barely got any sleep while doing your exam preps.”
“You’re practically family and they’re…outsiders. You know, but they don’t,” sighed the other. “Don’t worry about me, hyung. I can manage. Besides, you have enough on your own plate at the moment. It would do you better to be less stressed out by other things,” Hyukjae pointed out with another wry smile.
The joyful expressions on Jungsoo’s face immediately fell at the statement. He knew perfectly well what Hyukjae was trying to imply. Angie. His wife was alone at home, three hours away from their current location. It really didn’t help that she was freaking out over some unknown stalker who had been harassing them – or specifically, her – for ages.
“It’s not like I can do anything about it,” Jungsoo exhaled, shoulders slumping in defeat. “It’s orders from the company.”
“You can,” Hyukjae retorted mildly. “You just have to stop placing our fans on such a high pedestal. Things have changed. You’re married, hyung. Your family should come first.”
Jungsoo frowned. “They do, Hyukjae. I would never give my family up for anything else in the world.”
“And yet you’re here instead of accompanying your very pregnant wife back in Seoul,” Hyukjae raised an eyebrow at him, eyeing him sceptically.
The Super Junior leader frowned again. Hyukjae had a point.
“Me aside–” Jungsoo stressed, determined to change the subject. He didn’t really want to discuss about his decision to appear for the concert in Gwangju instead of being with Angie, especially when it gave him a massive headache just by thinking about it. Besides, he was constantly sending text messages to his wife to make sure that she was okay. Surely she would be safe without him for the evening? “–I’m pretty sure you’re already immune to people whispering nonsense behind your back. So what else is troubling you?”
“Yesung hyung was right when he said you’re better off working as a mind reader,” Hyukjae finally heaved a sigh, stuffing his face into a cushion which he had grabbed off the other sofa.
“So I was right,” the other man smiled thinly. “What’s up? You know you can always tell me stuff.”
Hyukjae raised his gaze from the cushion for a brief moment and locked it with Jungsoo’s. “Promise me you won’t tell anyone else? Especially not Donghae?” he pleaded with the most pitiful look he could muster. Something which he knew could butter his older brother up easily.
Jungsoo laughed. “I won’t if you insist. Why are you so afraid of letting Donghae know anyway?”
“He’ll strangle me for being an idiot,” Hyukjae mumbled miserably.
“Are things that bad on your side? I haven’t seen you in such a state in a very long while,” Jungsoo pointed out, suddenly feeling worried about the dancer. His upbeat self was nowhere to be found.
“I guess that’s what happens when you’re interested in the girl who is now one of your best friend’s girlfriend.”
The frown on Jungsoo’s expressions deepened at the statement, before transforming into an unmistakable scowl. “You’re not trying to tell me you’ve fallen for Minyoung, are you? Because I would personally kill you before Donghae even finds out about this.”
Hyukjae jumped at the older man’s words, his face as pale as a sheet of paper. “What the hell are you talking about hyung?! Of course I wouldn’t even think of hitting on any of your girlfriends! Brother’s code, remember?” he exclaimed, feeling incensed that Jungsoo would think of him in such a manner.
Jungsoo visibly relaxed at the reassurance, however. “Oh, so this girl is your friend… what’s his name again? – Shin-il’s girlfriend?”
Hyukjae nodded in a solemn manner.
“Have you even known her long enough to say that you’re in love with her?”
“Hyung, I didn’t say that I’m in love with her,” Hyukjae deadpanned. “I’m just… interested in being friends with her.”
“That’s new,” Jungsoo blurted. A pained yelp erupted from his throat moments later when Hyukjae landed a punch on his arm. “Hey! You know it’s true! How long has it been since you’re genuinely interested in just being friends with someone of the opposite gender?”
Hyukjae slumped into his seat. “A very long while…” he admitted, albeit reluctantly.
“There,” Jungsoo concluded, executing a little victory dance before his expressions turned serious again. “Anyway, I don’t see why you’re in such a huge dilemma, you idiot.”
“What–” the younger man started defensively, feeling every bit as offended by the term.
Jungsoo raised a hand to stop him before he could get the rest of his argument out. Hyukjae crossed his arms in front of his chest with a scowl on his face.
“My point is,” Jungsoo began again, hoping that Hyukjae wouldn’t attempt to interrupt him again, “if you intend to be friends with this girl, there’s nothing wrong with it. As long as you don’t attempt to turn her into your girlfriend somewhere along the way, of course. I’m sure Shin-il-sshi will understand.”
Hyukjae’s muscles loosened up slightly, and he turned to lock his gaze with Jungsoo’s. “Are you sure?” he asked with a wry smile.
“I can’t vouch that Shin-il-sshi will definitely not be upset or be remotely possessive over her, but you can always try. If you think that he’s pissed at you for being too close to his girlfriend, then you should take a step back.”
A gummy smile took over Hyukjae’s expressions by now, and he moved to pull Jungsoo into a tight hug. “Thanks, Teukkie hyung. You’re the best,” he said, just as the other Super Junior members burst into the room in a noisy mess.
* * * * *
Seohyeon ran a hand through her hair in frustration, prodding the butt of the pencil against her temple as she attempted to focus on her assignments that lay open in front of her. She was sporting a headache, and it didn’t at all help that there was a couple on the other side of her cubicle in the library who was being… less than discreet with their display of affection.
She guessed that they were indulging in a pretty steamy tongue war, judging by the wet, sloppy sounds gasps and giggles that reach her ears from time to time. A shudder ran down her spine when some unpleasant images flashed across her mind.
She scoffed, to think that I chose the most private corner so that I wouldn’t be disturbed.
“Focus,” Seohyeon told herself with finality, though at a controlled tone so that it wouldn’t alarm the couple. They didn’t seem to have realised that there were other students in their corner of the library.
A frown creased her forehead at her own thoughts. Shouldn’t she be interrupting them instead? She had the right to.
The contemplation ran around in her thoughts for a brief moment, before Seohyeon shook her head and picked up her pencil again. She would have to make do with the uncomfortable atmosphere she was in. At least it was better than having to hear the pair of seniors exchanging raunchy remarks in a too-loud voice right across the table.
Now that was the true definition of awkward. She really didn’t need to know what they planned to do with each other in the comforts of their dorm room in ten minutes’ time. So she upped and moved to her current location with a barely-managed polite bow at the pair.
Heaving a sigh, Seohyeon tuned out the pair seated on the reverse side of the cubicle, hoping that they would at least tune it down a little. And she would’ve succeeded in focusing on her studies, if not for the couple’s attempt at a conversation.
“You’re such a good kisser,” the girl had giggled breathlessly moments later. A soft moan of pleasure left her lips barely seconds after that; Seohyeon really didn’t want to know what had just happened.
“Everyone tells me that,” the guy boasted, also panting hard. His voice was rather strained, but something about its quality made Seohyeon perk up in attention.
That sounds familiar…
“Are you sure you wouldn’t get into trouble, doing this?” The girl spoke up again before Seohyeon could even deduce why the man’s voice gave her a sense of familiarity, derailing her train of thoughts.
There was a short pause, and then the man started talking again. “If you’ll be a good girl and not breathe a word about this to the rest, I won’t,” he let out a low chuckle, and Seohyeon found herself standing up in surprise at the recognition of the person’s voice.
The couple seemed equally astonished by Seohyeon’s actions, and the man’s eyes dilated in horror at the sight of Seohyeon.
“Hyukjae?” she found herself exclaiming before she could even stop herself.
* * * * *
His hands, which were in his pockets, were clenched into tight fists as he watched her walk towards her usual spot at the waterfront. He didn’t know why, but he felt extremely guilty when he was caught red-handed fooling around with another student by Seohyeon – in the library, no less.
He knew how much she loved and respected the place from the sparse amount of conversations they had shared.
That look of disbelief that flashed across her expressions when she managed to recognise him told a million other things – one of them being utter disappointment. There was also a trace of discomfort in her eyes, but he really couldn’t blame her. He was probably a little too loud with his remarks earlier.
Hyukjae heaved a dismayed sigh and hastened his pace, taking a seat right next to Seohyeon – she had asked to talk to him once she had gotten over the initial shock. His head was hung low as he absentmindedly kicked at the air right above the surface of the water. The corner of his lips curved up into a wry smile when he caught his reflection in the water; he seemed rather pathetic, not knowing how to initiate a conversation or what to say after that awkward encounter.
Minutes of silence passed between the both of them, before Hyukjae turned to look at her. “I’m sorry,” he said, surprised when she mirrored his actions and apology. He quirked an eyebrow at her. “What are you apologising for?”
Seohyeon flashed an awkward smile at him. “For interrupting your… business earlier.”
Hyukjae flushed a deep shade of scarlet. He could even feel the tips of his ears burning up from embarrassment. “I – uh – it doesn’t matter,” he blurted, mentally chastising himself at his lame reply. “I’m sorry you had to witness something like that,” he quickly added.
She squirmed uncomfortably in her position, seemingly having remembered something that had occurred. Hyukjae couldn’t help but wonder just how much she had heard.
“Are you… do you do this frequently?” she asked.
“No!” he immediately jumped, having every intention of correcting her misperception of him. It really wasn’t in his nature to be getting it on with girls in public places, but his heart craved for the intimate attention. Perhaps it was his way of tuning out unhappy events.
The awkward atmosphere was lifted slightly when Seohyeon chuckled a little at his response. She thought that it was rather adorable. “Relax, I’m not going to judge you because of your lifestyle,” she pointed out. “It’s your life after all, and you’re free to live it however you want to,” Seohyeon added.
Her heart wrenched at her own words. She knew full well how it felt to be judged have your life controlled by someone else. She wouldn’t dare wish it upon someone else.
Hyukjae visibly loosened up at the reassurance, lifting his head for the first time since they had arrived at the waterfront. “I’m glad. I was beginning to worry that you were going to ignore me after that incident.”
“I won’t. You have my word for it,” she said, and observed him closely. “You seem to be rather troubled, though. Did something happen?”
Hyukjae nearly fell backwards at the question; his arms which were supporting his weight gave way out of surprise. “N-no, why do you ask?”
“Like I said, you look troubled. Your focus is swimming around,” Seohyeon smiled knowingly.
“I…” he started, hesitating a little before shaking his head in response. “It’s not fair to burden you with my troubles, Seohyeon. Don’t worry about it; I’ll get through this somehow.”
“So you do have something on your mind,” she nudged him lightly with her shoulder. “Come on, you can always tell me what’s going on. That’s what friends are for, right?”
He looked at her with large, watery eyes, surprised by her for the umpteenth time that day – though this was a good kind of surprise. “We’re… friends?”
Seohyeon laughed at his question. “Of course we are, Hyukjae! Unless you refuse to befriend me?”
“No, but–”
“Then that’s settled. This has something to do with your group leader’s wife, doesn’t it?” she cut him off with a soft expression, watching as he stiffened at the question.
Although she didn’t know the specifics, or how close Hyukjae was with the person called Angie, but she knew that he was probably very affected by what had happened to the woman. He missed an entire week of classes; even Shin-il had failed to contact him.
“It’s… difficult,” he managed to choke out, staring up at the skies in hopes that his tears could be forced back in by the gravitational pull.
“I’m sorry to hear that, Hyukjae. If you need someone to talk to, I’m always here to listen,” Seohyeon said, giving him a light squeeze on his arm.
At that particular moment, he secretly felt relieved that there was finally someone else who understood him outside the entertainment circle, the other being Shin-il. The wall he had built around him was slowly crumbling into pieces, and it took all of his effort to not pull her into a rib-crushing hug and sob his heart out.
Monday, April 09, 2012
That Someone Is You - Chapter 12
12
Her fingers were clenched into fists as she looked out of her dorm window, feeling extremely annoyed at the sight she was beholding. There, under the tree in the distance, she caught sight of her roommate tip-toeing to give a much-hated man a peck on the check.
Even though she had vowed not to meddle in Seohyeon’s private life, Min-ae couldn’t help but keep her watchful eyes on the pair. Unbeknownst to Seohyeon, she had run a background check on their senior Yoon Shin-il. She did not like the information that had turned up from her search at all.
His list of past flings was longer than the list of boutiques she knew of – and that speaks volumes.
Min-ae narrowed her eyes when Seohyeon finally pulled away from Shin-il moments later with her head bowed low. It didn’t take much for Min-ae to know for sure that her roommate was blushing, or to confirm that Shin-il had put forth the request for Seohyeon to be his girlfriend. Seohyeon was usually a person who kept the boundaries clear with someone of the opposite gender.
Besides, the way they entwined their fingers together as they strolled towards the female dorms was enough proof of it.
Slamming the windows shut in a fit of rage, Min-ae stalked over to her bad and sat on it with her arms crossed in front of her chest. She tried to soothe the pang of jealousy rising in her chest by controlling her breathing rate, but to no avail. The fury bubbled continuously like a pot of boiling water.
She glanced upwards when the door of her room opened up and revealed the beaming face of her roommate behind it. Without even thinking, she shot the most hateful glare she could muster in the latter’s direction.
There was a score that she had to settle.
* * * * *
Seohyeon froze in her steps when she felt the heavy atmosphere in the room. The happy expression immediately fell when she noticed the glare on Min-ae’s face. She hesitated a little, then took a step forward. She stopped again when Min-ae’s glare intensified.
“Min, a-are you okay?” Seohyeon asked softly, wondering what had angered her friend so much. This was one of those rare occasions where she would actually encounter a seething Min-ae, and she did not like it at all.
“What do you think?” came the biting retort. Seohyeon flinched at the intonation used on her.
“I wouldn’t know if you refuse to tell me what’s going on, Min,” she frowned. She hadn’t been around her roommate long enough for the day to get on her nerves.
“I saw everything,” Min-ae said quietly, but the animosity and accusation was evident in her voice. “I saw everything you did with that Yoon Shin-il down there.”
At this point of time, Seohyeon stiffened in horror. She had not banked on her friend watching her every move closely, let alone find out about it so soon. But this was not right; why was Min-ae observing her? “Were you deliberately spying on me?” she therefore snapped, feeling incensed. Friends or not, this was taking it too far.
“No;” Min-ae said, but Seohyeon saw that ounce of hesitation and guilt flicker in her usually clear eyes. “I just chanced upon it while taking in some fresh air by the window. What was the big idea anyway? What were you thinking when you kissed him?” she asked, spitting out the much-detested word with a disgusted expression.
“I did not kiss him, Min!” Seohyeon defended herself. “It was just a damned peck on the cheek!”
“It makes no difference!” Min-ae almost shouted, standing up in a fit of rage. Although she was trying to control her temper, her rationality was slowly slipping off the edge. The scene of Seohyeon kissing Shin-il just wouldn’t leave her mind. The fact that this was the first time she ever saw her best friend kissing someone from the opposite gender added on to her anger.
“Why are you being so hostile about this anyway? Didn’t you say you wouldn’t stop me from seeing Shin-il oppa any longer?” Seohyeon shot back. She took a step backwards when Min-ae’s glare shot up a notch. She really could not comprehend why her friend was so pissed at her.
“Oh, it’s ‘oppa’ now, is it?” Min-ae said with a sarcastic laugh, the disbelief written all over her expressions. “And you’re asking why am I being so hostile? I’m trying to protect you here!”
“Protect me from what, Min?! I’m no longer that little girl who has no idea how to differentiate right from wrong! I’ve been trying to get away from that family who tries to dictate every step I take, every action I make, yet you’re right here doing the exact same things!” Seohyeon raised her voice further.
She blinked away the tears of frustration, thinking about how she never liked arguing with her best friend because it shred her heart bit by bit with every heated exchange they made. But the other girl wasn’t making things easier for her.
“I’m trying to tell you this – Yoon Shin-il isn’t as nice or as suave as you think he is! I said I wouldn’t care if you continued to befriend him, but I’m absolutely not okay with you dating him!”
Seohyeon stared Min-ae down at the sound of the statement. “You don’t know anything about Shin-il. You haven’t even had a single decent conversation with him, so how could you pass judgements on him so wantonly? We’ve been through this discussion!”
“It’s precisely because we’ve talked about this before that your actions are making me frustrated! How could you be so gullible and naïve?!” the taller one of the pair snapped back with as much ferocity, but she regretted her own words the moment they had left her mouth.
Seohyeon’s expressions distorted into that of hurt and betrayal. Nevertheless, her expressions were wiped clean within the next given moment, leaving no trace of what she truly felt. “So that’s what you perceive of me all these years,” she slowly said, her voice eerily calm. “Gullible and naïve, am I?”
“Hyeon, that’s not what I meant–” Min-ae started to explain herself, but her friend raised a hand to stop her.
“A person’s true thoughts and feelings present themselves when they’re livid,” Seohyeon continued, a ghost of a smile playing on her lips. It was a smile that did not reach her eyes. One that made her seem distant. Like a completely different person.
Min-ae gulped hard. She chastised herself for letting her emotions get to her head. “Seohyeon, I–”
“Forget it,” Seohyeon stated bluntly. “If you think that I’m still some stupid, naïve little girl, then so be it.”
Several tense moments of silence passed them by, punctuated only by the ragged breathing tainted by fury on both their parts. And then the most dreaded phrase escaped Seohyeon’s throat.
“Stay out of my life.”
* * * * *
Hyukjae tugged on his hoodie as he slowly came to a stop in the midst of his morning jog around the campus. He ignored the stares and whispers surrounding him, cocking his head to the side in a concerned manner at the sight that caught his attention.
There, in the distance, was a girl seated at the picnic under the willow tree. She was staring blankly at the textbooks that lay open in front of her, unblinking. Although she seemed poised to write, with her fingers forming a firm grip around her pen, her hand was unmoving.
He would have thought that she was merely caught in a daydream, if not for that melancholic expression she was wearing.
Sucking in a deep breath to give himself some form of courage, Hyukjae found himself jogging towards the girl in anticipation.
* * * * *
“Hey.”
Seohyeon snapped out of her thoughts and inhaled sharply, startled, when a deep but familiar voice greeted her. The slight frown on her face disappeared when she glanced up and recognised the person who was standing right across her.
“Sunbae, hello,” she echoed the greeting with a small nod. “What brings you here today?”
“I could ask you the same thing,” a laugh rumbled in his throat. “I suppose this is the first time I’m meeting you away from the waterfront.”
Seohyeon chuckled a little at the statement. “You’re not the first person who tells me that,” she admitted, eyes crinkling in amusement at a distant but fond memory. “Anyway, that’s not my only hangout joint on campus. I do spend a healthy amount of time at other places too. Why don’t you take a seat?”
“Why, thank you for the invitation,” he bowed slightly, obliging her. He waved at the fans who squealed his name out loud, before turning to lock his gaze with Seohyeon again. “So why is this fair lady seated here alone with such a sad expression?”
“Fair lady?” she wondered out loud, amused. “That’s a first. Why do you say that, though?”
“It shows, Seohyeon-sshi,” Hyukjae pointed out knowingly with a soft tap on the side of his face, his gaze gentle. “Did something happen? You were much happier than this when I last saw you yesterday.”
“I don’t even know where to begin,” she sighed, lips pursed in hesitation.
“Date went wrong?” he asked, though Hyukjae immediately apologised to her when her eyes shot up at him in surprise. “I’m sorry; I’m prying way too much. You don’t have to answer to that.”
Seohyeon shook her head with a small smile. “It’s alright, Hyukjae sunbae. The date went well.”
Hyukjae swore his heart fell at the second part of her sentence, but caught himself just in time before those feelings were reflected on his face. The last thing he’d want was for her to misunderstand him (not that he was any clearer about his own feelings, really). He secretly heaved a sigh of relief when he noticed how Seohyeon wasn’t really concentrating on his face.
“Oh,” he managed to choke out with a hopefully even voice before the silence became too prolonged. “Then what is it? Are you worrying over your studies?” Hyukjae asked, eyes scanning the books which were scattered across the table in front of them.
His eyes crossed and his head spun at the sheer amount of words in tiny print on both pages. Whichever department she was studying under, it definitely wasn’t his. And he was glad – in a perverse way – that he wasn’t enrolled in her course, either. He couldn’t imagine having to pore over these books at the end of a long, schedule-packed day.
“That’s not it either, sunbae. I… kind of had a massive argument with my best friend late last night,” she finally admitted, heaving a forlorn sigh.
Hyukjae was tempted to give her a pat on the head to make her feel better, but he pulled his hand back just in time. People were watching. It wouldn’t him any good if people misunderstood his intentions – or their relationship. Vicious talk would definitely follow. He did not want Seohyeon to get hurt because of such people.
For now all he could do was to keep up the charades and give off the impression that they were classmates. That was the only way he could hang around with girls without inviting unwanted gossip.
“Over a guy?” Hyukjae tried to lighten up the atmosphere, thinking that it was merely a harmless joke. But a painful thump came from the direction of his chest when she gave a barely noticeable nod; he felt sick at being so tactless with his words. “I’m sorry–” he began, only to be interrupted when someone walked past him and marched right up to Seohyeon.
He could only stare at the pair, eyes wide open and mouth agape, as the newcomer planted a peck on Seohyeon’s cheek. He became even more confused when the man turned around to flash a bright smile at him, of which was quickly replaced by that of surprise as well.
This can’t be happening.
* * * * *
“So…” The skinnier man started, shattering the silence that had settled in the room. His roommate barely moved a muscle, his eyes rolling in Hyukjae’s direction to take a glimpse of Hyukjae’s expressions. Shin-il’s outstretched arms remained rested on his knees which were drawn up onto the bed. “That was the girl you were talking about? Seohyeon?”
Shin-il nodded in confirmation. “I was planning to tell you about her… eventually,” he said sheepishly. “But you discovered about her in record time. I was surprised that you actually knew her.”
“I met her on campus the other time,” he explained. “I didn’t know you were chasing after a junior,” Hyukjae added with a frown. It was definitely unlike his friend to be interested in someone from the lower grade.
“What are you talking about?” Shin-il made a face at him, mock hurt. “I remember telling you that I was interested in a freshman.”
“You did?” the other man asked, surprised. “I don’t really remember, sorry.”
“You’re getting old, Hyukkie. Your memory’s rotten,” Shin-il laughed. That earned him a soaring pillow which hit him square in the face and cut his chortle short. “Hey!”
“Serves you right for avoiding the subject whenever I ask you about this girl you’re interested in,” Hyukjae childishly stuck out his tongue. “Also, don’t ever call me old!”
Shin-il rolled his eyes. “Why are you being so worried about your age anyway? I’m older than you in terms of age.”
“By a couple of months,” the dancer snorted, though sat upright in his bed moments later so that he was facing Shin-il properly. “What are your plans with Seohyeon anyway? Gonna be serious about it this time?”
“Are you kidding me? When do I ever get serious in a relationship?” Shin-il laughed. “The fun’s just beginning,” he then says, and Hyukjae swore to God that this was the first time ever that he felt like beating his friend into pulp.
He had to end the conversation abruptly by lying to Shin-il that he wanted to head to bed early, otherwise he would’ve converted his thoughts into actions.
Her fingers were clenched into fists as she looked out of her dorm window, feeling extremely annoyed at the sight she was beholding. There, under the tree in the distance, she caught sight of her roommate tip-toeing to give a much-hated man a peck on the check.
Even though she had vowed not to meddle in Seohyeon’s private life, Min-ae couldn’t help but keep her watchful eyes on the pair. Unbeknownst to Seohyeon, she had run a background check on their senior Yoon Shin-il. She did not like the information that had turned up from her search at all.
His list of past flings was longer than the list of boutiques she knew of – and that speaks volumes.
Min-ae narrowed her eyes when Seohyeon finally pulled away from Shin-il moments later with her head bowed low. It didn’t take much for Min-ae to know for sure that her roommate was blushing, or to confirm that Shin-il had put forth the request for Seohyeon to be his girlfriend. Seohyeon was usually a person who kept the boundaries clear with someone of the opposite gender.
Besides, the way they entwined their fingers together as they strolled towards the female dorms was enough proof of it.
Slamming the windows shut in a fit of rage, Min-ae stalked over to her bad and sat on it with her arms crossed in front of her chest. She tried to soothe the pang of jealousy rising in her chest by controlling her breathing rate, but to no avail. The fury bubbled continuously like a pot of boiling water.
She glanced upwards when the door of her room opened up and revealed the beaming face of her roommate behind it. Without even thinking, she shot the most hateful glare she could muster in the latter’s direction.
There was a score that she had to settle.
* * * * *
Seohyeon froze in her steps when she felt the heavy atmosphere in the room. The happy expression immediately fell when she noticed the glare on Min-ae’s face. She hesitated a little, then took a step forward. She stopped again when Min-ae’s glare intensified.
“Min, a-are you okay?” Seohyeon asked softly, wondering what had angered her friend so much. This was one of those rare occasions where she would actually encounter a seething Min-ae, and she did not like it at all.
“What do you think?” came the biting retort. Seohyeon flinched at the intonation used on her.
“I wouldn’t know if you refuse to tell me what’s going on, Min,” she frowned. She hadn’t been around her roommate long enough for the day to get on her nerves.
“I saw everything,” Min-ae said quietly, but the animosity and accusation was evident in her voice. “I saw everything you did with that Yoon Shin-il down there.”
At this point of time, Seohyeon stiffened in horror. She had not banked on her friend watching her every move closely, let alone find out about it so soon. But this was not right; why was Min-ae observing her? “Were you deliberately spying on me?” she therefore snapped, feeling incensed. Friends or not, this was taking it too far.
“No;” Min-ae said, but Seohyeon saw that ounce of hesitation and guilt flicker in her usually clear eyes. “I just chanced upon it while taking in some fresh air by the window. What was the big idea anyway? What were you thinking when you kissed him?” she asked, spitting out the much-detested word with a disgusted expression.
“I did not kiss him, Min!” Seohyeon defended herself. “It was just a damned peck on the cheek!”
“It makes no difference!” Min-ae almost shouted, standing up in a fit of rage. Although she was trying to control her temper, her rationality was slowly slipping off the edge. The scene of Seohyeon kissing Shin-il just wouldn’t leave her mind. The fact that this was the first time she ever saw her best friend kissing someone from the opposite gender added on to her anger.
“Why are you being so hostile about this anyway? Didn’t you say you wouldn’t stop me from seeing Shin-il oppa any longer?” Seohyeon shot back. She took a step backwards when Min-ae’s glare shot up a notch. She really could not comprehend why her friend was so pissed at her.
“Oh, it’s ‘oppa’ now, is it?” Min-ae said with a sarcastic laugh, the disbelief written all over her expressions. “And you’re asking why am I being so hostile? I’m trying to protect you here!”
“Protect me from what, Min?! I’m no longer that little girl who has no idea how to differentiate right from wrong! I’ve been trying to get away from that family who tries to dictate every step I take, every action I make, yet you’re right here doing the exact same things!” Seohyeon raised her voice further.
She blinked away the tears of frustration, thinking about how she never liked arguing with her best friend because it shred her heart bit by bit with every heated exchange they made. But the other girl wasn’t making things easier for her.
“I’m trying to tell you this – Yoon Shin-il isn’t as nice or as suave as you think he is! I said I wouldn’t care if you continued to befriend him, but I’m absolutely not okay with you dating him!”
Seohyeon stared Min-ae down at the sound of the statement. “You don’t know anything about Shin-il. You haven’t even had a single decent conversation with him, so how could you pass judgements on him so wantonly? We’ve been through this discussion!”
“It’s precisely because we’ve talked about this before that your actions are making me frustrated! How could you be so gullible and naïve?!” the taller one of the pair snapped back with as much ferocity, but she regretted her own words the moment they had left her mouth.
Seohyeon’s expressions distorted into that of hurt and betrayal. Nevertheless, her expressions were wiped clean within the next given moment, leaving no trace of what she truly felt. “So that’s what you perceive of me all these years,” she slowly said, her voice eerily calm. “Gullible and naïve, am I?”
“Hyeon, that’s not what I meant–” Min-ae started to explain herself, but her friend raised a hand to stop her.
“A person’s true thoughts and feelings present themselves when they’re livid,” Seohyeon continued, a ghost of a smile playing on her lips. It was a smile that did not reach her eyes. One that made her seem distant. Like a completely different person.
Min-ae gulped hard. She chastised herself for letting her emotions get to her head. “Seohyeon, I–”
“Forget it,” Seohyeon stated bluntly. “If you think that I’m still some stupid, naïve little girl, then so be it.”
Several tense moments of silence passed them by, punctuated only by the ragged breathing tainted by fury on both their parts. And then the most dreaded phrase escaped Seohyeon’s throat.
“Stay out of my life.”
* * * * *
Hyukjae tugged on his hoodie as he slowly came to a stop in the midst of his morning jog around the campus. He ignored the stares and whispers surrounding him, cocking his head to the side in a concerned manner at the sight that caught his attention.
There, in the distance, was a girl seated at the picnic under the willow tree. She was staring blankly at the textbooks that lay open in front of her, unblinking. Although she seemed poised to write, with her fingers forming a firm grip around her pen, her hand was unmoving.
He would have thought that she was merely caught in a daydream, if not for that melancholic expression she was wearing.
Sucking in a deep breath to give himself some form of courage, Hyukjae found himself jogging towards the girl in anticipation.
* * * * *
“Hey.”
Seohyeon snapped out of her thoughts and inhaled sharply, startled, when a deep but familiar voice greeted her. The slight frown on her face disappeared when she glanced up and recognised the person who was standing right across her.
“Sunbae, hello,” she echoed the greeting with a small nod. “What brings you here today?”
“I could ask you the same thing,” a laugh rumbled in his throat. “I suppose this is the first time I’m meeting you away from the waterfront.”
Seohyeon chuckled a little at the statement. “You’re not the first person who tells me that,” she admitted, eyes crinkling in amusement at a distant but fond memory. “Anyway, that’s not my only hangout joint on campus. I do spend a healthy amount of time at other places too. Why don’t you take a seat?”
“Why, thank you for the invitation,” he bowed slightly, obliging her. He waved at the fans who squealed his name out loud, before turning to lock his gaze with Seohyeon again. “So why is this fair lady seated here alone with such a sad expression?”
“Fair lady?” she wondered out loud, amused. “That’s a first. Why do you say that, though?”
“It shows, Seohyeon-sshi,” Hyukjae pointed out knowingly with a soft tap on the side of his face, his gaze gentle. “Did something happen? You were much happier than this when I last saw you yesterday.”
“I don’t even know where to begin,” she sighed, lips pursed in hesitation.
“Date went wrong?” he asked, though Hyukjae immediately apologised to her when her eyes shot up at him in surprise. “I’m sorry; I’m prying way too much. You don’t have to answer to that.”
Seohyeon shook her head with a small smile. “It’s alright, Hyukjae sunbae. The date went well.”
Hyukjae swore his heart fell at the second part of her sentence, but caught himself just in time before those feelings were reflected on his face. The last thing he’d want was for her to misunderstand him (not that he was any clearer about his own feelings, really). He secretly heaved a sigh of relief when he noticed how Seohyeon wasn’t really concentrating on his face.
“Oh,” he managed to choke out with a hopefully even voice before the silence became too prolonged. “Then what is it? Are you worrying over your studies?” Hyukjae asked, eyes scanning the books which were scattered across the table in front of them.
His eyes crossed and his head spun at the sheer amount of words in tiny print on both pages. Whichever department she was studying under, it definitely wasn’t his. And he was glad – in a perverse way – that he wasn’t enrolled in her course, either. He couldn’t imagine having to pore over these books at the end of a long, schedule-packed day.
“That’s not it either, sunbae. I… kind of had a massive argument with my best friend late last night,” she finally admitted, heaving a forlorn sigh.
Hyukjae was tempted to give her a pat on the head to make her feel better, but he pulled his hand back just in time. People were watching. It wouldn’t him any good if people misunderstood his intentions – or their relationship. Vicious talk would definitely follow. He did not want Seohyeon to get hurt because of such people.
For now all he could do was to keep up the charades and give off the impression that they were classmates. That was the only way he could hang around with girls without inviting unwanted gossip.
“Over a guy?” Hyukjae tried to lighten up the atmosphere, thinking that it was merely a harmless joke. But a painful thump came from the direction of his chest when she gave a barely noticeable nod; he felt sick at being so tactless with his words. “I’m sorry–” he began, only to be interrupted when someone walked past him and marched right up to Seohyeon.
He could only stare at the pair, eyes wide open and mouth agape, as the newcomer planted a peck on Seohyeon’s cheek. He became even more confused when the man turned around to flash a bright smile at him, of which was quickly replaced by that of surprise as well.
This can’t be happening.
* * * * *
“So…” The skinnier man started, shattering the silence that had settled in the room. His roommate barely moved a muscle, his eyes rolling in Hyukjae’s direction to take a glimpse of Hyukjae’s expressions. Shin-il’s outstretched arms remained rested on his knees which were drawn up onto the bed. “That was the girl you were talking about? Seohyeon?”
Shin-il nodded in confirmation. “I was planning to tell you about her… eventually,” he said sheepishly. “But you discovered about her in record time. I was surprised that you actually knew her.”
“I met her on campus the other time,” he explained. “I didn’t know you were chasing after a junior,” Hyukjae added with a frown. It was definitely unlike his friend to be interested in someone from the lower grade.
“What are you talking about?” Shin-il made a face at him, mock hurt. “I remember telling you that I was interested in a freshman.”
“You did?” the other man asked, surprised. “I don’t really remember, sorry.”
“You’re getting old, Hyukkie. Your memory’s rotten,” Shin-il laughed. That earned him a soaring pillow which hit him square in the face and cut his chortle short. “Hey!”
“Serves you right for avoiding the subject whenever I ask you about this girl you’re interested in,” Hyukjae childishly stuck out his tongue. “Also, don’t ever call me old!”
Shin-il rolled his eyes. “Why are you being so worried about your age anyway? I’m older than you in terms of age.”
“By a couple of months,” the dancer snorted, though sat upright in his bed moments later so that he was facing Shin-il properly. “What are your plans with Seohyeon anyway? Gonna be serious about it this time?”
“Are you kidding me? When do I ever get serious in a relationship?” Shin-il laughed. “The fun’s just beginning,” he then says, and Hyukjae swore to God that this was the first time ever that he felt like beating his friend into pulp.
He had to end the conversation abruptly by lying to Shin-il that he wanted to head to bed early, otherwise he would’ve converted his thoughts into actions.
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